BOOK REVIEW: I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy

Audiobook Length: 6 hours and 26 minutes

Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Genre: Nonfiction, Memoir, Autobiography

Read Start Date: November 16, 2023

Read Finish Date: November 19, 2023

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads: A heartbreaking and hilarious memoir by iCarly and Sam & Cat star Jennette McCurdy about her struggles as a former child actor—including eating disorders, addiction, and a complicated relationship with her overbearing mother—and how she retook control of her life.

Jennette McCurdy was six years old when she had her first acting audition. Her mother’s dream was for her only daughter to become a star, and Jennette would do anything to make her mother happy. So she went along with what Mom called “calorie restriction,” eating little and weighing herself five times a day. She endured extensive at-home makeovers while Mom chided, “Your eyelashes are invisible, okay? You think Dakota Fanning doesn’t tint hers?” She was even showered by Mom until age sixteen while sharing her diaries, email, and all her income.

In I’m Glad My Mom Died, Jennette recounts all this in unflinching detail—just as she chronicles what happens when the dream finally comes true. Cast in a new Nickelodeon series called iCarly, she is thrust into fame. Though Mom is ecstatic, emailing fan club moderators and getting on a first-name basis with the paparazzi (“Hi Gale!”), Jennette is riddled with anxiety, shame, and self-loathing, which manifest into eating disorders, addiction, and a series of unhealthy relationships. These issues only get worse when, soon after taking the lead in the iCarly spinoff Sam & Cat alongside Ariana Grande, her mother dies of cancer. Finally, after discovering therapy and quitting acting, Jennette embarks on recovery and decides for the first time in her life what she really wants.

Told with refreshing candor and dark humor, I’m Glad My Mom Died is an inspiring story of resilience, independence, and the joy of shampooing your own hair.

My Review: I borrowed this audiobook from the library as it was on the “popular” list. I have also seen this book several times at the bookstore. I was unaware that Jennette McCurdy was a child actor who starred on the iCarly show and co-starred with Ariana Grande on Sam & Cat. I’ve heard of these shows but have never seen them. There is a lot to unpack in this poignant, revealing memoir.

I’m Glad My Mom Died is a raw, honest, and deeply personal memoir about the challenges of growing up in the spotlight as a child star and the emotional turmoil caused by a complex and often abusive relationship with her mother. McCurdy, best known for her roles as Sam Puckett on Nickelodeon’s iCarly and Sam & Cat, opens up about her experiences with eating disorders, body image issues, and substance abuse, all of which were exacerbated by her mother’s controlling and demanding nature.

I was really surprised that the mother not only knew about McCurdy’s eating disorder (starting at the age of 12, she went on a “restrictive diet,” but essentially, the mother TAUGHT McCurdy how to be an anorexic. That is so totally sick and made my heart hurt for the author. Mothers are supposed to protect their children, not set them up for a lifetime of trauma and suffering.

The title of the book, which may seem jarring at first, is a reflection of McCurdy’s complex emotions following her mother’s death from cancer in 2013. While she grappled with grief and loss, she also recognized that her mother’s passing had freed her from the unhealthy dynamics and expectations that had dominated her life for so long.

McCurdy’s writing is both heartbreaking and insightful as she chronicles her struggles to find her own voice and identity amidst the pressures of fame (which the author never wanted to begin with–she was living her mother’s dream) and her mother’s relentless pursuit of stardom. She describes her mother’s controlling behavior, which included micromanaging her appearance, her career, and even her personal relationships. McCurdy felt trapped in a cycle of self-loathing and self-destruction, driven by her mother’s constant criticism and her own desire to please her.

Amidst the darkness, there are moments of humor and resilience. McCurdy’s self-deprecating humor and sharp wit provide a counterpoint to her pain, and her determination to break free from her mother’s control is inspiring. She eventually seeks therapy, which helps her to recognize unhealthy patterns and begin to heal from the trauma of her childhood.

I would recommend this book to adults of all ages, especially those who are interested in the entertainment industry.

Stats: As of writing this review (December 11, 2023) this book has a 4.48 rating on Goodreads.

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