self-help

BOOK REVIEW: Your First Novel by Ann Rittenberg and Laura Whitcomb

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Title: Your First Novel

Authors: Ann Rittenberg and Laura Whitcomb

Book Length: 312 pages

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

Genre: Nonfiction, Writing, Reference, Self-Help

Read Start Date: January 10, 2023

Read Finish Date: May 11, 2023

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads:  Your Expert Guide to Writing and Publishing a Novel.

In this revised and expanded edition of Your First Novel, novelist Laura Whitcomb, seasoned literary agent Ann Rittenberg, and her knowledgeable assistant, Camille Goldin, team up to provide you with the essential skills needed to craft the best novel you can–and the savvy business know-how to get it published. Complete with updated references, analysis of new best-selling novels, and the same detailed instruction, Whitcomb will show you how

   • Practice the craft of writing, using both your right- and left-brain
   • Develop a flexible card system for organizing and outlining plot
   • Create dynamic characters that readers love–and love to hate
   • Study classic novels and story structure to adapt with your ideas

Featuring two new chapters on choosing your path as an author and understanding the world of self-publishing, Rittenberg and Goldin dive into the business side of publishing,

   • What agents can–and should–do for your future
   • Who you should target as an agent for your burgeoning career
   • How the mysterious auction for novels actually goes down
   • Why you should learn to work with your agent through thick and thin
Guiding your first novel from early words to a spot on the bookshelf can be an exciting and terrifying journey, but you’re not alone. Alongside the advice of industry veterans, Your First Novel Revised and Expanded also includes plenty of firsthand accounts from published authors on their journeys, including Dennis Lehane, C.J. Box, Kathleen McCleary, David Kazzie, and more.

My Review: Your First Novel Revised and Expanded Edition: A Top Agent and a Published Author Show You How to Write Your Book and Get It Published is a comprehensive guidebook that offers valuable insights and expert advice on the process of writing and publishing your first novel. In this revised and expanded edition, a highly regarded literary agent and a successful published author join forces to provide aspiring writers with practical techniques, step-by-step instructions, and industry secrets to help bring their literary dreams to fruition.

This book covers a wide range of topics, including developing compelling characters, constructing engaging plots, crafting authentic dialogue, refining writing style, and polishing manuscript drafts. It also delves into the intricacies of the publishing industry, providing guidance on query letters, book proposals, finding the right literary agent, and navigating the submission and publication process.

I am only giving it three stars because I was disappointed in the publishing aspect (the reason why I bought the book). First, a lot of the advice was not useful to me. Of course, this is a subjective review, and therefore subjective reasoning. You might like the book more, or find it more useful if you had a degree in writing, had published somewhere, or live in America. For example, she advised that 1) you have to have writing credentials already (I am an unpublished lawyer, so nothing like that in my background) and 2) you need to go to conventions and meet agents, or you need to do readings in bookstores, etc. I live in Austria so none of these things are possible.

While the first portion of the book (how to write your first novel) was interesting to read, I feel like in order to fully make use of it, one would have to take notes. I was also not familiar with a lot of the novels referenced / used as examples in the book (or if I knew of the novel, I had not read it).

Lastly, I was a little annoyed before I even read the book because I came across the book on the website of Ann Rittenberg’s literary agency when I was researching agents to query. The link on her webpage brought me to the old edition of the book being sold on Amazon. It wasn’t until I went to start reading it and entered it into Goodreads, that I discovered that there had been a newer version of the book published years later. Obviously a book published in 2018 is going to have more timely and up to date information on the industry than a book written in 2006. So I ended up having to buy the book….again. Why would you not update your webpage? Or at least make sure the link was correct?

So in conclusion, am I saying this book isn’t a good resource? No, it could definitely be. It just wasn’t for me.

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BOOK REVIEW: Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don’t Know by Malcolm Gladwell

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43848929._SX318_Title: Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don’t Know

Author: Malcolm Gladwell

Audiobook Length: 8 hours and 42 minutes

Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Genre: Nonfiction, Psychology, Self-Help, Sociology, Science, Business, Language, Communication

Read Start Date: February 9, 2022

Read Finish Date: February 11, 2022

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads: How did Fidel Castro fool the CIA for a generation? Why did Neville Chamberlain think he could trust Adolf Hitler? Why are campus sexual assaults on the rise? Do television sitcoms teach us something about the way we relate to each other that isn’t true?

While tackling these questions, Malcolm Gladwell was not solely writing a book for the page. He was also producing for the ear. In the audiobook version of Talking to Strangers, you’ll hear the voices of people he interviewed–scientists, criminologists, military psychologists. Court transcripts are brought to life with re-enactments. You actually hear the contentious arrest of Sandra Bland by the side of the road in Texas. As Gladwell revisits the deceptions of Bernie Madoff, the trial of Amanda Knox, and the suicide of Sylvia Plath, you hear directly from many of the players in these real-life tragedies. There’s even a theme song – Janelle Monae’s “Hell You Talmbout.”

Something is very wrong, Gladwell argues, with the tools and strategies we use to make sense of people we don’t know. And because we don’t know how to talk to strangers, we are inviting conflict and misunderstanding in ways that have a profound effect on our lives and our world.

My Review: I listened to the audiobook version of this book and I have to say it was awesome. The audiobook is read by the author and also includes some bonus material e.g. recordings of the statements / incidents quoted in the book.

The book opens with the tragic story of Sandra Bland, a black woman, who commits suicide in jail after being arrested by an over zealous cop. She was originally pulled over for “failure to signal” after she changed lanes for the said cop without signaling, as he came up behind her. When the officer asks how she is, Bland responds that she is upset. The officer then asks her if she “is done”. Although the officer says that it was not meant in a sarcastic way, Bland takes it as such, escalating the traffic stop. When Bland lights a cigarette to calm her nerves, the officer asks her to put it out. She refuses. Escalating the traffic stop further, the officer tells her to get out of the car, because she had failed to follow his direction. Bland initially refuses. The incident was caught on the officer’s vest cam, and with the audiobook you can hear the actual tape.

The book dives into the potential reasons why this tragedy occurred. The author posits, for example, that when talking with strangers, people “default to truth”, in other words that we initially believe what a stranger is telling us, even if it is a lie. For most of us, the instinct is to believe, not distrust. Another example is “transparency”. Sometimes people are transparent and strangers can infer state of mind by actions, other times, people do not act as we think they should and so we misunderstand them. This is what happened in the case of Sandra Bland.

I really liked listening to the different stories that that author gave as support for his theory. Even if you don’t like, or agree with, the author’s theory, the stories were really interesting e.g. a cuban spy who no one suspected, the interrogation of KSM after 9/11, and the Amanda Knox story. What made it more interesting was the format. I can’t imagine reading this book in paper format. The quotes would have less impact when only read and not listened to.

I definitely recommend this book, but I think that it should be read as an audiobook.

BOOK REVIEW: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson

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28257707Title: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

Author: Mark Manson

Book Length (Audiobook): 5 hours 17 mins

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Genre: Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology

Read Start Date: September 21, 2019

Read Finish Date: September 22, 2019

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads: In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be “positive” all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people.

For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. “F**k positivity,” Mark Manson says. “Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it.” In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up.

Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—”not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault.” Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek.

There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

My Review: “Giving too many fucks is bad for your mental health”. Truer words had never been spoken! Except for maybe a “key to a good life is giving a fuck about less”. Unlike other self help books, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k tells it to ya in a brutally honest way.  I’ve read other self help books, but what makes this unique (besides the casual swearing) is the fact that there are no sugar coated, ice cream pooping unicorns in this book. Like, you know that time your boyfriend cheated on you, and then you felt bad about it? Well, it’s your fault you feel bad. Seriously? It’s not the cheating boyfriend’s fault? Well, here’s the thing: Can you control that he cheated on you? Nope. Can you control his actions? Nope. But you can control your response to such actions, and you can take responsibility for the way you feel. This is a really uncomfortable realization — that only you can control your own happiness. My mind was blown. Totally.

Although this book was short, I do not feel that it lacked anything that longer self help books do (and it might even have been better this way). The author is just really good at cutting to the chase and saying what he needs to say in minimal words.

If you enjoy self help books, I would check this one out. You won’t be disappointed.

 

 

 

BOOK REVIEW: Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis

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40591267._SY475_Title: Girl, Stop Apologizing

Author: Rachel Hollis

Book Length (Audiobook): 7 hours 37 mins

Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Genre: Nonfiction, Self-Help, Personal Development

Read Start Date: July 31, 2019

Read Finish Date: August 4, 2019

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads: Rachel Hollis has seen it too often: women not living into their full potential. They feel a tugging on their hearts for something more, but they’re afraid of embarrassment, of falling short of perfection, of not being enough.

In Girl, Stop Apologizing, #1 New York Times bestselling author and founder of a multimillion-dollar media company, Rachel Hollis sounds a wake-up call. She knows that many women have been taught to define themselves in light of other people—whether as wife, mother, daughter, or employee—instead of learning how to own who they are and what they want. With a challenge to women everywhere to stop talking themselves out of their dreams, Hollis identifies the excuses to let go of, the behaviors to adopt, and the skills to acquire on the path to growth, confidence, and believing in yourself.

My Review: This is the second book that I have read by Rachel Hollis. The first book was Girl, Wash Your Face. You can read the review here. Within the first 18 minutes of listening to the audiobook, I already liked it. She was speaking real truths, and I could totally understand her point. In the first part of the book, Hollis expounded on her theory that adults are the product of how, as toddlers, they learned to get attention. Over-achievers gained attention as children for doing well. Some toddlers get attention by being affectionate, so they learn to become dependent upon affection. Some toddlers get attention by making others laugh, so they learn how to entertain…and so on. This made perfect sense to me.

Her book only became better as it went on.

At about 1.5 hours into the book, Hollis had already laid down some really good advice. This book is really resonating with me so far. Hollis talks about setting realistic goals for yourself, and how to realistically achieve them. I have the goals to get more fit and to finish writing my first novel. My book currently has about 25,000 words, and I have not been able to get much done in the past few weeks. Hollis suggests that one should plan to work on her goals, at a time that works best for her regarding these goals. After working for 10 hours a day, I am usually so tired from work, that I cannot muster the motivation to do anything. Therefore, for the next week, I will give it a go and try to wake up early in the morning — maybe that will help.

So, I tried it for one day, and it didn’t help, because, well, I am not a morning person. So taking Hollis’ advice, I switched back to evenings — although it really seems that only weekends work for me.

After finishing her book, I can say that I thoroughly enjoyed it. Hollis is a really smart woman, and gives some really good advice on life and how to become your best self. I even started following her instagram! This book also helped me get through some tough workouts, so this book is a big YES for me!

This book also “fueled” my workout on August 3rd and August 4th.

 

 

BOOK REVIEW: Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis

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35542451Title: Girl Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be

Author: Rachel Hollis

Book Length (Audiobook): 7 hours 4 mins

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

Genre: Non-fiction, Humor, Memoir, Self-help

Read Start Date: January 3, 2019

Read Finish Date: January 23, 2019

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads: “Founder of the lifestyle website TheChicSite.com and CEO of her own media company, Chic Media, Rachel Hollis has created an online fan base of hundreds of thousands of fans by sharing tips for living a better life while fearlessly revealing the messiness of her own. Now comes her highly anticipated first book featuring her signature combination of honesty, humor, and direct, no-nonsense advice.

Each chapter of Girl, Wash Your Face begins with a specific lie Hollis once believed that left her feeling overwhelmed, unworthy, or ready to give up. As a working mother, a former foster parent, and a woman who has dealt with insecurities about her body and relationships, she speaks with the insight and kindness of a BFF, helping women unpack the limiting mind-sets that destroy their self-confidence and keep them from moving forward.

From her temporary obsession with marrying Matt Damon to a daydream involving hypnotic iguanas to her son’s request that she buy a necklace to “be like the other moms,” Hollis holds nothing back. With unflinching faith and tenacity, Hollis spurs other women to live with passion and hustle and to awaken their slumbering goals.”

My Review: I’m having a really hard time writing a review about this book because I really do not know how I feel about it. I didn’t love it, and I didn’t hate it. It paled in comparison to the other memoirs I read this year so far (Educated and The Year of Less), but it was also entertaining. Sometimes I could not relate to the author (e.g. she is a Christian and talks openly about God, and I am not religious). Other times, I did relate to what she was saying, and I generally liked her “you go girl” attitude.

This book is by far not my favorite, but a solid 3 out of 5 stars.

 

BOOK REVIEW: The Year of Less by Cait Flanders

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The Year of Less: How I Stopped Shopping, Gave Away My Belongings, and Discovered Life Is Worth More Than Anything You Can Buy in a StoreThis book is a self-help memoir written (and with respect to the Audiobook, read) by the author, Cait Flanders. In The Year of Less Flanders tells the story of her road to a healthier, clutter free, fiscally smarter life. At the time when Flanders decided to have a “year of less”, she was an alcoholic, shopaholic, and $30,000 in debt as a result of her addictions.

Flanders had her own blog during her “year of less” called “Blonde on a Budget“, where she posted about the trial and tribulations of her experiment. At the beginning of the book, Flanders says that the book is not just a compilation of her blog posts, but rather is about personal stories she had never shared before.

These stories are about not only her struggles with the “shopping ban”, but also about the recovery process from her addictions, and general stories from her life.

Even if you cannot relate to the author’s addictive tendencies (I could not as an example), this book is an inspiring story about the struggles of adopting a minimalist lifestyle in a consumer driven society.

This book is only about a 5-6 hour read (on Audiobook) and is definetely worth reading this year.

Check out this book on Goodreads: The Year of Less: How I Stopped Shopping, Gave Away My Belongings, and Discovered Life Is Worth More Than Anything You Can Buy in a Store http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35488858-the-year-of-less

BOOK REVIEW: The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning by Margareta Magnusson

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35297297Title: The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family From a Lifetime of Clutter

Author: Margareta Magnusson

Book Length (Audiobook): 2 hours 38 mins

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Genre: Nonfiction, Self-Help

Read Start Date: September 15, 2018

Read Finish Date: September 16, 2018

Brief Summary of the Plot from Goodreads: In Sweden there is a kind of decluttering called döstädning, dömeaning “death” and städning meaning “cleaning.” This surprising and invigorating process of clearing out unnecessary belongings can be undertaken at any age or life stage but should be done sooner than later, before others have to do it for you. In The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, artist Margareta Magnusson, with Scandinavian humor and wisdom, instructs readers to embrace minimalism. Her radical and joyous method for putting things in order helps families broach sensitive conversations, and makes the process uplifting rather than overwhelming.

Margareta suggests which possessions you can easily get rid of (unworn clothes, unwanted presents, more plates than you’d ever use) and which you might want to keep (photographs, love letters, a few of your children’s art projects). Digging into her late husband’s tool shed, and her own secret drawer of vices, Margareta introduces an element of fun to a potentially daunting task. Along the way readers get a glimpse into her life in Sweden, and also become more comfortable with the idea of letting go.

My Review: Swedish death cleaning is the practice of decluttering your life prior to death. This book tells the story of the authors own death cleaning, as well as some stories from her past.

As I read…listened actually…to this book while hiking in the Austrian mountains (the audiobook takes less then 3 hours), I could not help to think of all the people in my life who have passed away. I could not help but to remember the difficult task of cleaning out my grandparents’ house.

This book, although being primarily about the art of death cleaning itself, is also about life, and the inevitabilty of death. The author offers practical advice for decluttering your life, so that loved ones will not be burdened with the task.

I would recommend this book for people of any age who (like myself) tend to keep far more possessions than necessary.