BOOK REVIEW: Goddamn Electric Nights by William Pauley III

Title: Goddamn Electric Nights

Author: William Pauley III

Audiobook Length: 2 hours and 38 minutes

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Genre: Fiction, Short Stories, Horror, Bizzaro Fiction, Novella

Read Start Date: March 12, 2023

Read Finish Date: March 15, 2023

Brief Summary of the Plot from GoodreadsWhen electricity hangs in the air so thick the moon and stars fizzle and drown in a sea of light, the people living within it, breathing it in, can never be “normal.”

From disfigured mutants accidentally murdering god to a man falling madly in love with a blood-thirsty VCR, we promise you’ve never read anything as bizarre as this!

In these six tales, Pauley explores the lives of those living in the darkest corners of the world, those living electric:

Contains the stories:

1) Slime Night!
2) Killing Teddy (previously published under the names Insection 8 and The Third Floor)
3) The Spiders of Honeyville
4) Hypnagogia
5) $5 Electric Suzie
6) Spin Doctors Mixtape

My Review: Goddamn Electric Nights is a collections of various stories. I have reviewed each one separately below. I received this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

Slime Night!: (about 40 minutes). Out of all the stories, this one was my least favorite. It depicts the tale of two teenage boys vying for the affections of the same girl. However, their portrayal of her is unflattering, portraying her as promiscuous and having undergone multiple “wire hanger” abortions. The boys engage in a bizarre pinball game known as Slime Night!, where losing results in being drenched in slime. By the conclusion, one of the characters experiences a significant personal revelation. While not terrible, I believe the story could benefit from more extensive exploration of the emotional complexities, perhaps through a longer narrative.

Killing Teddy: (about 20 minutes). The story opens on an excellent note, with the first-person protagonist, who is the superintendent of a building, abruptly awakened by a deafening scream followed by the menacing sound of a chainsaw. To his horror, he finds a woman and a colossal ant inside one of the apartments. The woman recounts an implausible tale of a Japanese game show where the prize money is 500k, and the contestant, Teddy, must be killed and transformed into hundreds of distinct species to entertain the audience. Without weighing the consequences, the superintendent agrees to help the woman for a hefty sum. However, unforeseen events unfold as a result. Overall, this story is a delightfully imaginative and entertaining read.

The Spiders of Honeyville: (about 28 minutes). The story commences with a plumber visiting his lover’s residence to unclog her shower drain. However, after he eliminates a snake, a yellow fog bursts out from inside it, killing both the plumber and his mistress and turning them into zombies. In the second part, we learn that the snake species has evolved a revenge mechanism, which results in the predator’s death. Scientists are studying this phenomenon and come across a pregnant woman infected with it, from whom they deliver the baby via cesarean section. But the baby is promptly stolen, and in a pursuit, the thief drops the baby, causing it to explode and release a yellow cloud over the entire town. Consequently, the scientists devise a plan to combat the zombies with genetically engineered spiders, which backfires, creating a town full of zombie Spider-Men. Overall, this story is hilarious and had me chuckling throughout. This one is probably my favorite story in the collection.

Hynagagia: (about 15 minutes). This was the first part of The Tower, another novella by the author, which I reviewed here.

$5 Electric Suzie: (about 17 mins). In this story, Susie, an anthropomorphic VCR, needs blood to stay alive. The protagonist of the story becomes infatuated with Susie and starts feeding her his own blood. Eventually, he develops an obsession with her and begins to kill people, starting with his own parents. The tale begins with the protagonist as a young boy, and as he grows up, he continues to feed her. He spends his whole life in the service of the VCR. This story was weird, and not one of my favorites. Nothing much happened from a plot perspective, and the sexual connection with the VCR was uncomfortable.

Spin Doctor Mix Tape: (about 38 mins). The story begins on a somber note, with the protagonist’s girlfriend’s cat dying accidentally. However, the narrative is imbued with a sense of humor, as the narrator adopts the tone and delivery of a newscaster. The girlfriend forgives him, and when he invites her and his parents over for dinner, everything goes smoothly until they realize that he fed them the cat instead of the planned chicken. The protagonist explains that he was short on cash and had no other option. The girlfriend breaks up with him again, but after listening to a Spin Doctor mixtape he made for her, she decides to give him another chance. Although the cat’s death and consumption were a bit off-putting, the story was enjoyable overall.

50 Book ReviewsReviews PublishedProfessional Reader

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Netgalley. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

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Goodreads Monday: March 13, 2023

Goodreads Monday is hosted by Budget Tales Book Blog. “Goodreads Monday allows you to post about what books are on your “to read” lists, the progress you have made on your current books and reading challenge, and any other Goodreads news!”

Books I Finished In the Past Week:

Starvation Heights: A True Story of Murder and Malice in the Woods of the Pacific Northwest by Gregg Olsen

In 1911 two wealthy British heiresses, Claire and Dora Williamson, came to a sanitorium in the forests of the Pacific Northwest to undergo the revolutionary “fasting treatment” of Dr. Linda Burfield Hazzard. It was supposed to be a holiday for the two sisters. But within a month of arriving at what the locals called Starvation Heights, the women were emaciated shadows of their former selves, waiting for death. They were not the first victims of Linda Hazzard, a quack doctor of extraordinary evil and greed who would stop at nothing short of murder to achieve her ambitions. As their jewelry disappeared and forged bank drafts began transferring their wealth to Hazzard’s accounts, Dora Williamson sent a last desperate plea to a friend in Australia, begging her to save them from the brutal treatments and lonely isolation of Starvation Heights.

In this true story—a haunting saga of medical murder set in an era of steamships and gaslights—Gregg Olsen reveals one of the most unusual and disturbing criminal cases in American history.

My review of this book is pending.

Books I am Currently Reading:

Ripper: The Secret Life of Walter Sickert by Patricia Cornwell

From New York Times bestselling author Patricia Cornwell comes Ripper: The Secret Life of Walter Sickert, a comprehensive and intriguing exposé of one of the world’s most chilling cases of serial murder—and the police force that failed to solve it.

Vain and charismatic Walter Sickert made a name for himself as a painter in Victorian London. But the ghoulish nature of his art—as well as extensive evidence—points to another name, one that’s left its bloody mark on the pages of history: Jack the Ripper. Cornwell has collected never-before-seen archival material—including a rare mortuary photo, personal correspondence and a will with a mysterious autopsy clause—and applied cutting-edge forensic science to open an old crime to new scrutiny.

Incorporating material from Portrait of a Killer: Jack the Ripper—Case Closed, this new edition has been revised and expanded to include eight new chapters, detailed maps and hundreds of images that bring the sinister case to life.

Progress: 367 pages of 497 (March 6th: 321 pages)

Your First Novel Revised and Expanded Edition: A Top Agent and a Published Author Show You How to Write Your Book and Get It Published by Anne Rittenberg and Laura Whitcomb

In this revised and expanded edition of Your First Novel, novelist Laura Whitcomb, seasoned literary agent Ann Rittenberg, and her knowledgeable assistant, Camille Goldin, team up to provide you with the essential skills needed to craft the best novel you can–and the savvy business know-how to get it published. Complete with updated references, analysis of new best-selling novels, and the same detailed instruction, Whitcomb will show you how to:

– Practice the craft of writing, using both your right- and left-brain
– Develop a flexible card system for organizing and outlining plot
– Create dynamic characters that readers love–and love to hate
– Study classic novels and story structure to adapt with your ideas
Featuring two new chapters on choosing your path as an author and understanding the world of self-publishing, Rittenberg and Goldin dive into the business side of publishing, including:

– What agents can–and should–do for your future
– Who you should target as an agent for your burgeoning career
– How the mysterious auction for novels actually goes down
– Why you should learn to work with your agent through thick and thin
Guiding your first novel from early words to a spot on the bookshelf can be an exciting and terrifying journey, but you’re not alone. Alongside the advice of industry veterans, Your First Novel Revised and Expanded also includes plenty of firsthand accounts from published authors on their journeys, including Dennis Lehane, C.J. Box, Kathleen McCleary, David Kazzie, and more.

Progress: Kindle book 57% (March 6th: 44%)

Goddamn Electric Nights by William Pauley III

When electricity hangs in the air so thick the moon and stars fizzle and drown in a sea of light, the people living within it, breathing it in, can never be “normal.”

From disfigured mutants accidentally murdering god to a man falling madly in love with a blood-thirsty VCR, we promise you’ve never read anything as bizarre as this!

In these six tales, Pauley explores the lives of those living in the darkest corners of the world, those living electric:

Contains the stories:

1) Slime Night!
2) Killing Teddy (previously published under the names Insection 8 and The Third Floor)
3) The Spiders of Honeyville
4) Hypnagogia
5) $5 Electric Suzie
6) Spin Doctors Mixtape

Progress: Audiobook 25%

Next Up:

Title: Mad Honey

Author: Jodi Picoult

Audiobook Length: 15 hours and 12 minutes

Goodreads Summary: A soul-stirring novel about what we choose to keep from our past, and what we choose to leave behind.

Olivia McAfee knows what it feels like to start over. Her picture-perfect life—living in Boston, married to a brilliant cardiothoracic surgeon, raising a beautiful son, Asher—was upended when her husband revealed a darker side. She never imagined she would end up back in her sleepy New Hampshire hometown, living in the house she grew up in, and taking over her father’s beekeeping business.

Lily Campanello is familiar with do-overs, too. When she and her mom relocate to Adams, New Hampshire, for her final year of high school, they both hope it will be a fresh start.

And for just a short while, these new beginnings are exactly what Olivia and Lily need. Their paths cross when Asher falls for the new girl in school, and Lily can’t help but fall for him, too. With Ash, she feels happy for the first time. Yet at times, she wonders if she can she trust him completely . . .

Then one day, Olivia receives a phone call: Lily is dead, and Asher is being questioned by the police. Olivia is adamant that her son is innocent. But she would be lying if she didn’t acknowledge the flashes of his father’s temper in him, and as the case against him unfolds, she realizes he’s hidden more than he’s shared with her.

Mad Honey is a riveting novel of suspense, an unforgettable love story, and a moving and powerful exploration of the secrets we keep and the risks we take in order to become ourselves.

Goodreads Monday: March 6, 2023

Goodreads Monday is hosted by Budget Tales Book Blog. “Goodreads Monday allows you to post about what books are on your “to read” lists, the progress you have made on your current books and reading challenge, and any other Goodreads news!”

Books I Finished In the Past 2 Weeks:

Our Missing Hearts by Celeste Ng

A novel about a mother’s unbreakable love in a world consumed by fear.

Twelve-year-old Bird Gardner lives a quiet existence with his loving but broken father, a former linguist who now shelves books in a university library. Bird knows to not ask too many questions, stand out too much, or stray too far. For a decade, their lives have been governed by laws written to preserve “American culture” in the wake of years of economic instability and violence. To keep the peace and restore prosperity, the authorities are now allowed to relocate children of dissidents, especially those of Asian origin, and libraries have been forced to remove books seen as unpatriotic—including the work of Bird’s mother, Margaret, a Chinese American poet who left the family when he was nine years old.

Bird has grown up disavowing his mother and her poems; he doesn’t know her work or what happened to her, and he knows he shouldn’t wonder. But when he receives a mysterious letter containing only a cryptic drawing, he is pulled into a quest to find her. His journey will take him back to the many folktales she poured into his head as a child, through the ranks of an underground network of librarians, into the lives of the children who have been taken, and finally to New York City, where a new act of defiance may be the beginning of much-needed change.

My review of this book is pending.

Love on the Brain by Ali Hazelwood

From the New York Times bestselling author of The Love Hypothesis comes a new STEMinist rom-com in which a scientist is forced to work on a project with her nemesis—with explosive results.

Bee Königswasser lives by a simple code: What would Marie Curie do? If NASA offered her the lead on a neuroengineering project – a literal dream come true – Marie would accept without hesitation. Duh. But the mother of modern physics never had to co-lead with Levi Ward.

Sure, Levi is attractive in a tall, dark, and piercing-eyes kind of way. But Levi made his feelings toward Bee very clear in grad school – archenemies work best employed in their own galaxies far, far away.

But when her equipment starts to go missing and the staff ignore her, Bee could swear she sees Levi softening into an ally, backing her plays, seconding her ideas… devouring her with those eyes. The possibilities have all her neurons firing.

But when it comes time to actually make a move and put her heart on the line, there’s only one question that matters: What will Bee Königswasser do?

My review of this book is pending.

Books I am Currently Reading:

Ripper: The Secret Life of Walter Sickert by Patricia Cornwell

From New York Times bestselling author Patricia Cornwell comes Ripper: The Secret Life of Walter Sickert, a comprehensive and intriguing exposé of one of the world’s most chilling cases of serial murder—and the police force that failed to solve it.

Vain and charismatic Walter Sickert made a name for himself as a painter in Victorian London. But the ghoulish nature of his art—as well as extensive evidence—points to another name, one that’s left its bloody mark on the pages of history: Jack the Ripper. Cornwell has collected never-before-seen archival material—including a rare mortuary photo, personal correspondence and a will with a mysterious autopsy clause—and applied cutting-edge forensic science to open an old crime to new scrutiny.

Incorporating material from Portrait of a Killer: Jack the Ripper—Case Closed, this new edition has been revised and expanded to include eight new chapters, detailed maps and hundreds of images that bring the sinister case to life.

Progress: 321 pages of 497 (no progress in the past 2 weeks)

Your First Novel Revised and Expanded Edition: A Top Agent and a Published Author Show You How to Write Your Book and Get It Published by Anne Rittenberg and Laura Whitcomb

In this revised and expanded edition of Your First Novel, novelist Laura Whitcomb, seasoned literary agent Ann Rittenberg, and her knowledgeable assistant, Camille Goldin, team up to provide you with the essential skills needed to craft the best novel you can–and the savvy business know-how to get it published. Complete with updated references, analysis of new best-selling novels, and the same detailed instruction, Whitcomb will show you how to:

– Practice the craft of writing, using both your right- and left-brain
– Develop a flexible card system for organizing and outlining plot
– Create dynamic characters that readers love–and love to hate
– Study classic novels and story structure to adapt with your ideas
Featuring two new chapters on choosing your path as an author and understanding the world of self-publishing, Rittenberg and Goldin dive into the business side of publishing, including:

– What agents can–and should–do for your future
– Who you should target as an agent for your burgeoning career
– How the mysterious auction for novels actually goes down
– Why you should learn to work with your agent through thick and thin
Guiding your first novel from early words to a spot on the bookshelf can be an exciting and terrifying journey, but you’re not alone. Alongside the advice of industry veterans, Your First Novel Revised and Expanded also includes plenty of firsthand accounts from published authors on their journeys, including Dennis Lehane, C.J. Box, Kathleen McCleary, David Kazzie, and more.

Progress: Kindle book 44% (last reporting 38%)

Starvation Heights: A True Story of Murder and Malice in the Woods of the Pacific Northwest by Gregg Olsen

In 1911 two wealthy British heiresses, Claire and Dora Williamson, came to a sanitorium in the forests of the Pacific Northwest to undergo the revolutionary “fasting treatment” of Dr. Linda Burfield Hazzard. It was supposed to be a holiday for the two sisters. But within a month of arriving at what the locals called Starvation Heights, the women were emaciated shadows of their former selves, waiting for death. They were not the first victims of Linda Hazzard, a quack doctor of extraordinary evil and greed who would stop at nothing short of murder to achieve her ambitions. As their jewelry disappeared and forged bank drafts began transferring their wealth to Hazzard’s accounts, Dora Williamson sent a last desperate plea to a friend in Australia, begging her to save them from the brutal treatments and lonely isolation of Starvation Heights.

In this true story—a haunting saga of medical murder set in an era of steamships and gaslights—Gregg Olsen reveals one of the most unusual and disturbing criminal cases in American history.

Progress: ebook 85% (last reporting 56%)

Next Up:

Title: Goddamn Electric Nights

Author: William Pauley III

Audiobook Length: 2 hours and 38 minutes

Goodreads Summary: When electricity hangs in the air so thick the moon and stars fizzle and drown in a sea of light, the people living within it, breathing it in, can never be “normal.”

From disfigured mutants accidentally murdering god to a man falling madly in love with a blood-thirsty VCR, we promise you’ve never read anything as bizarre as this!

In these six tales, Pauley explores the lives of those living in the darkest corners of the world, those living electric:

GODDAMN ELECTRIC NIGHTS.

Contains the stories:

1) Slime Night!
2) Killing Teddy (previously published under the names Insection 8 and The Third Floor)
3) The Spiders of Honeyville
4) Hypnagogia
5) $5 Electric Suzie
6) Spin Doctors Mixtape